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im not another stupid little teenage fucking whore


&we'll get stoned in some park
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[Thursday, 05/14/09
at 7:02pm]

hiiiiiii. ive taken adderall for the first time in my life. and im sick of writing my 8pg paper about shakespeare sooooo i thought id do this haha.

only 6 more days til i go home for the summerrrrr!
im so excited because im pretty sure i have a job with two of my best friendssss, jill and shareece! which is SICK. jb edwards uniform store. come visit and bring me starbucks =)
amanda will be here most of june and even though i dont have a car im sure that will be awesomeee.
im going to florida for ten days and thats also awesome because i havent been there in 2 years.
speaking of 2 years.. me and sam will be celebrating our 2 year anniversary in a couple weeks. woowoo. weve recently started playing tennis together and i love it despite how terrible i am. still completely and totally in love with my bebe. eeeeeeee
ummmm im pretty sure i got a 3 something gpa this semester. english is defintiely the major for me. i give my opinon on books and stories and i get A's and B's. and i still love umass but i do want to go home more than anything because im a baby and get home sick too easily.
i cut my hair 6 inches. its still a couple inches below my shoulders but its such a change for me. i also got a new phone. and strappy sandals that make me feel more girly. i was trying to explain to my mom that i feel like a COMPLETELY different person with all these little changes. she didnt understand but i think raachel would.
ive seen both brand new and girl talk this year. girl talk was at my school and a lot of people hated him so it wasnt that amazing. i still had a great time though! this brand new show was the best one ive been to yet. it was in like a small gym and i had a perfect view of jesse the entire time.
hi i love my life.

sooooo ill be in the library for 13 more hours if anyone sees this and wants to talk hahaha. probably go to the midnight buffet then come back. but yuh.
PEACE.

read 3 cmnt

[Wednesday, 03/04/09
at 6:20pm]
[ mood | bored ]


im lonelyyyy.
its so cold out so i dont go to class unless i have to. (and havent gotten below a B plus yet. knock on wood).
and no one lgood ives in my building (well shareece does. but shes so busy being a nursing major and all. and she lives on the 18th floor and i live on the 9th. hahah too much of a hassle sometimes)
sam is always busy.. either with homework or he goes home to work. we see each other as much as possible but its like an hour here and there.
i dont have a roommate.
so the only social contact i get is when someone wants to eat (which believe it or not.. is making my stomach look very unproportional to my body. ahah)
 

gahhh i live for the nights on the weekendsss. and warmth soooon pleeeeeassseee so people are actually willing to walk the two feet to hang out.

so i sleep. all the time. i hate winter. and i just wanted people to know... haha ugh.

cmnt

[Sunday, 11/23/08
at 7:55pm]
[ mood | -_- ]

love lockdown by kanye west.
amanda. listen. now. ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

ugh. im editing this. im fraeking out. amanda. its your friggen retarded 3 years and 11 month anniversary so i wont bother you. but i know youll look at this. im freraking out. ive been listening to this song literally. ALL NIGHT.

omg. WHY IS IT YOUR ANNIVERSARY. i know youd understand this.

look.

im not lovin you the way i wanted to
what i had to do... had to run from you
im in love with you.. but the vibe is wrong
and that haunted me all the way home

im not lovin you the way i wanted to
see i wanna move but i cant escape from you

i cant keep myself and still keep you too

gotta keep it goin keep the lovin goin
keep it on a roll. only god knows
if i be with you.. baby im confused
you choose. you choose



dude.

read 2 cmnt

[Monday, 03/31/08
at 2:36pm]

hahaha im ridiculous because im transferring AGAIN. but i really wanted to go from umass lowell to umass amherst and i missed the deadline because its only a month after 1st semester started.
and worcester state isnt really that great. the professors are incredibly dumb and i dont feel like im going to college.
but yep. this morning i was accepted to umass so im wiiiiicked excited and i was accepted into journalism too. sweeeet. im so happyyyyy. SO HAPPY. i finally feel like im goign to a real college and going to have that real experience and actually learn something. 

oh yess

cmnt

[Wednesday, 03/05/08
at 2:57pm]
JustCallMe6Pack: well either way
lm soooo rad: haha what
JustCallMe6Pack: do you really care either way?
lm soooo rad: i dont know. after that phone call i feel weird
lm soooo rad: im like.. psycho or something
lm soooo rad: what the hell
JustCallMe6Pack: haha
JustCallMe6Pack: babe
JustCallMe6Pack: i love you
everyone needs a boy that listens to a girl weirdly freak out about work calling her and still love her. mmmmmm<3.
cmnt

[Saturday, 02/16/08
at 12:03am]

ayy. the only time i post in this is when im bored. and im sure bored. i hate getting out of work at 11 on a friday night. dont even wanna do anything after.
WELL valentines day was nice. i went to amherst. we exchanged simple gifts. and sam took me out to dinner and i passed out after. but everything was obviously amazing. i coudlnt stop laughing the entire time and i was juts in the best mood. i looooooove him. 
work is sweeeeell. i work in the back and they ALWAYS put me out in the front to greet people. guess its just my amazing looks. haaa. ive made friends there which is always good. 
i made 3 different plans for tomorrow. i hate when i do this. i always end up doing NOTHING when this happens hahah. 
ughhhhhh okay. ill go to bed. im so boooooored

cmnt

[Thursday, 12/20/07
at 12:16am]
 well. im offically done with lowell. im already in a better mood knowing that i dont have to go there ever again. i cant even say it was a learning experience. cuz what did i learn? that i need friends. that lowell is depressing. not to take 8 am classes. haha uhhhhhh. yea. but hey. its done. im gonna put it all in the past. srsly.

ive applied for jobs. i have a group interview at hollister on friday. im trying to branch out with friends. im going to a new school. CHRISTMAS IS COMINGGGG which means people liek adrian/husband is coming hoooooome. gah. happyhappyhappy about everything.
cmnt

[Sunday, 12/02/07
at 8:28am]

so im 18 finally. hahahah yayayayay.
sam took me to build a bear yesterday which is cute of him. and we made the most perfectl ittle bear and named it sammy haha. then he took me to bugaboo and i ordered a freakin feast hahha. ugh ive never eaten so much

at 6 this morning my dad kept trying to wake me up and i refused to wake up. i didnt think my parents got me anything special cuz i didnt really ask for anything special. i thought it could wait but my whole family piled into my room. and i got some books and socks and candles from my sister and oh a really funny card. and i was happy. 
my dad hands me a small wrapped box. it was the ipoddd toooooouuuuuuuuccccccch. gaaaaaaah. i came home last night from providence..  telling them how amaaazzig it was when i played with it at the apple store and how you can go online on it and ahhh. and theyve had it for me for a month hahah aahhh. 

family dinner today.
then  back to school to write a paper. -_- stupid birthday haha. ipod touch<3.

cmnt

[Tuesday, 07/17/07
at 5:16pm]
so i need to get this out. because ive never been so mad. i dont even know if im being rational.

i do everything for sam. literally. he pretty much doesnt do anything himself. i buy him food. and make him food. i bathe him in the shower -_-.  whenver he needs me to.. ill go over his house to wake him up since his alarm  doesnt work. which means i wake up early for him. ill drive him wherever he needs to go. since now he doesnt have a job.. he cant pay for gas. i watch him play videogames every second of our lives and give him confidence boosts when hes doing bad even though i dont give a shit about the game. i have sex with him whenever he wants.. which is like 3 fucking times a day.

what do i ever get in return? nothing. "babe i love you. youre the best girlfriend. youre gorgeous." i get compliments. hell pay for food sometimes. .... tahts it...

all i wanted today was to go to six flags. i wanted to DO  something. rather than lay around in his bed. he told me to go over and wa ke him up. i told him i raelly didnt want to lay around for hours. he promised me we would lay there for 15 minutes and leave. SO i went there. but apparently the asshole was too busy playing videogames ALL NIGHT LONG last night. didnt go to sleep once. so when i got there to wake him up. he only had about 2 hours of lseep. he wouldnt wake up. so i laid around for a couple hours. giving him time to sleep a little more and wake up. 430 rolled around and hes not getting up at all. im starving. i dont even wanna go to six flags anymore. i just ask him to go out to eat. which i would have to pay for anyways. and we would take my car. he would juts sit there. but "ehhhh i cant. this is the hardest thing ive ever done" he keeps talking about how bad he feels. but he doesnt feel bad. if he felt bad he wouldve gotten up. ive gotten only a couple hours of sleep before. its not PAINFUL like he was making it seem. i told him i was leaving in 5 minutes. when the 5 minutes are up he tries getting up but goes right back to sleep. i walk out of his room as hes screaming 'i love you'. im just so pissed that i didnt sya it back. 

i havent heard from him. hes probably sleepign again. 
and im sitting here. crying. becauseeee this hsit always happens. 
and im tired of it.
read 2 cmnt

[Tuesday, 06/05/07
at 12:51am]
ugh
i just found out im rooming with 3 other girls next year. 
im pissed. i hate girls. and theres gonna be THREE! ahh
read 2 cmnt

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